Wookiee Hut Cuisine presents:
Mexinese-Chixican: Food of the 'Verse
by Susu and MaceVindaloo

The future was an amalgam of cultures; some things stayed distinct, while others got mushed into another. In the Firefly / Serenity 'verse, the two dominant cultures at the time were America and China. But if you look to America today, it's obviously an ever-moving fusion of food preferences. One strong nation-wide preference is Tex-Mex or Mexican food. If you combined it with Chinese food, what would you get? We think you'd have some great Chinese ingredients, and the fun forms of Mexican. Or sometimes, the other way around!

Carpet Pork Wrap
There is a shredded, dried jerky-style of pork in Chinese cuisine, and it's very "fluffy" with distinct strands. Children growing up in it feel it reminds them of shag carpet ... Served with a chunky, wet salsa — cooked or raw — it makes the best of preserved and aggressively cooked ingredients combined with ultra fresh things, for a spicy, salty, texture contrasting dish. It's messy to eat, but the wrap helps to limit the oozing!
    for each wrap sandwich:
  • large flour tortillas or lavash
  • soft lettuce leaves, washed, dried (like butter or Boston lettuce or red leaf)
  • shredded, dried pork strands, pulled fine
  • salsa or chutney
Lay down a piece of parchement or wax paper, then put a large flour tortilla down on it, and line with soft lettuce leaves. These will "insulate" the tortilla from the wet filling. You want the filling to be horizontal, relative to how you are looking at it. Lay the dried pork strands down, then cover with salsa or chutney to taste.

To form the wrap, first fold in the sides — this will secure the "top" and "bottom" of the wrap. Fold up the bottom over the filling, then roll up as tightly as practical upward. Roll the wrap into the parchment tightly, and refrigerate for an hour or so. This helps to soften and hydrate the pork.

To serve, cut diagonally in half right through the parchment, so you have two halves wrapped up. Peel the paper back to eat.

Back to the Menu: Mexinese / Chixican

Xiexian Quesadillas
Chinese barbecued pork is one of the crown jewels of cuisine, and it's no wonder that it would survive into the amalgamated world of the future. And it's good worked into other cuisines, too — even when smothered in cheese! Case in point, this "Tex-Mex pizza / sandwich" is a lot better with juicy Chinese barbecued pork, drizzled with hoisin sauce. When you taste it, you can only murmur, xiexian, or "thank you!"
    for each quesadilla:
  • 2 flour tortillas
  • thinly sliced char sui pork (or barbecued chinese red pork)
  • sliced tomatoes or salsa
  • sliced pickled / canned jalopeños
  • grated melting cheese (cheddar, mozzarella, monteray jack, etc. — one or a mixture)
Heat a dry pan (meaning no oil or butter, etc. in it), and place one tortilla in it. Arrange the pork pieces over it, not going to the edge. Add tomatoes or salsa and jalopeños (be sparse, the secret to a good quesadilla is not too many "wet" ingredients). Then scatter the cheese over the top — not too much, and again, not going to the edge. Place the other tortilla on top, and allow to heat till the bottom tortilla is hot and starts to brown and get crispy. Using your hand and a wide spatula, carefully flip the whole thing over and brown the other side. The quesadilla is done when the tortillas are crispy and browned, and the cheese is melted and everything inside is heated through. Transfer to a cutting board or serving platter, and cut into quarters or sixths for serving.

Serves 4 to 6 as an appetizer.

Back to the Menu: Mexinese / Chixican

Barbecued Pork Tacos
To some of us, the weakest part of tacos, gastronomically speaking, is the gloppy, runny meat mixture. And what the heck is taco seasoning, exactly? We chop up any leftover Chinese barbecued pork and use that, as is, at the bottom of the hard taco shell. Layer over that a bit of cheese, chopped fresh tomatoes, and shredded crispy lettuce ... it's less messy to eat that that weird granular ground beef mixture that's usually used, and this version doesn't need cooking at all, either! It's an improvement over the traditional stuff in just about every way. Not everything in the future is grim, see?

  • hard taco shells
  • char sui / barbecure red pork, chopped OR any chopped pork (like pulled pork) — leftovers are great
  • grated cheddar cheese, or monterray pepperjack
  • tomatoes, diced, or salsa
  • lettuce, sliced fine / shredded
  • hot sauce
  • sour cream
For each taco, put a scant tablespoonful of cooked chopped pork in the bottom of a taco, then let diners add other toppings as they wish. For a meal, prepare 2 to 4 tacos per person, on average.

Back to the Menu: Mexinese / Chixican

Enchilada Chinoise Lasagne
This recipe tastes "Tex-Mex" but the ingredients are not purely Tex-Mex. You can use beef or pork, you can opt for a normal yellow onion instead of the scallions, you can change the spicing to make it more Asian or more Mexican. Either way, it's more like a free-form lasagne, made in a crockpot instead of in the oven, though you can certainly opt for a low-heat oven instead ... it's a flexible dish with delicious results no matter the preference of your pantry or guests. You can even assemble it before you run out to fight a battle or do errands, and count on coming back to a hot meal! And if you're in a hurry, you can even serve the sauce over pasta, just as it is, for a nice warm homey supper. How did you live without this recipe??

  • 1 lb / 450 g ground pork or beef (leftover cooked pork or beef can be used instead — cube or mince small)
  • 1 cup chopped onion and/or scallions / green onions
  • ½ cup chopped green or red peppers
  • 2 cloves garlic, minced
  • 1 x 16 oz / 450 g can red beans, rinsed and drained
  • 1 x 16 oz / 450 g can black beans, rinsed and drained
  • 1 x 10 oz / 280 g can diced tomatoes and green chilis mix, or diced tomatoes on their own (do not drain)
  • 1 teaspoon chili powder or sambal
  • ½ teaspoon ground cumin or fresh ginger (grated)
  • ½ teaspoon dried oregano or cilantro
  • ½ teaspoon salt
  • 2 cups shredded melting cheeses: sharp cheddar, monterey Jack, mozarella, parmesan, etc. (½ lb / 8 oz / 250 g total weight of cheese) — use a mixture if you'd like
  • 6 or so flour tortillas (6 inches — or slightly smaller than your crockpot)
If you are using raw meat, cook it in a large hot skillet (no oil is needed), breaking up the minced meat as it cooks. When it has lost its pinkness, drain the fat and juices, then add the onion, garlic, and peppers and cook till softenend. If you are using leftover cooked meat, add a bit of oil in the pan, then add the meat, onion, garlic, and peppers.

Add the red and black beans, the tomatoes, the chili powder or sambal, the cumin or ginger, oregano or cilantro, and salt. Mix together and bring to a boil, then reduce the heat down to a simmer and cook for another 10 to 15 minutes.

In a 5 to 8 quart crockpot or a similarly sized baking dish (round, preferably). Add about ½ to ¾ cup of the sauce to the bottom, then put a tortilla on top of that, then scatter over with about ¼ to ½ cup of cheese, then top with sauce, then another tortilla, then cheese, and repeat, finishing with a topping of cheese.

If using a crockpot, set it on low heat, and cook for about 6 hours. In an oven, set the heat at about 200°F / 100°C, cover the baking dish with a lid or foil, and cook for at least 2 hours, or till hot and bubbling. If you are using the oven, remove the lid or foil and cook for another 15 or so minutes. You can serve like a lasagne.

You can serve the crockpot version like that too ... but you'll find the you can easily "roll" each layer off and eat it layer by layer. Your choice, depending on your audience and predilections!

Serves 4 to 6.

Back to the Menu: Mexinese / Chixican

Fried Rice Burritos
Like all cuisines of peasants, leftovers are used and re-used, and nothing ever wasted. If you have access to big, soft flour tortillas, bean dip, rice, Chinese pork or eggs ... you make a burrito, and it's a big, substantial meal. It's portable too, and doesn't actually have to have any fresh ingredients in it if all you have is frozen or canned fare. This is a good way to clean out the 'fridge, and truth be told, many in the 'verse looked forward to that once-weekly cleanout knowing this dish is on the menu.
    Basic Fried Rice
  • 1 to 2 tablespoons oil or fat
  • 1 small onion, chopped
  • 2 cups cold, cooked rice
  • salt, to taste
  • pepper, to taste
Heat the oil in the pan over medium high heat, then add the onion and stir-fry till they are slightly browned and softened. Lower the heat to medium-low and add the rice to the pan, breaking up bigger lumps (don't worry, you don't have to break it down perfectly, just enough to more or less evenly coat the bottom of the pan). Place a lid on the pan and allow to steam up, about 2 minutes. A crust should have formed on the pan's surface. You can use a spatula / scraper to break up the crust, and toss the rice. Continue to cook for another 2 minutes. Season to taste with salt and pepper. Serves 2 as a main part of a dish, or 6 as a side dish.

    Basic Bean Dip
  • 2 cups cooked beans, any type (we like pinto, and it's often cheaper!) — canned or cooked from dry beans
  • ¼ cup creamy salad dressing or mayonnaise or sour cream
  • 1 clove garlic, minced (or mashed, or paste)
  • 1 teaspoon cayenne pepper, or to taste
  • salt, to taste
  • pepper, to taste
In a food processor or using a masher, mash up the cooked beans to a smooth paste. Add the salad dressing, garlic, cayenne pepper, and ½ teaspoon salt and blend. Season further to taste. Yields 2¼ cups.

    Assembling the Burrito
  • Large flour tortillas
  • Basic Bean Dip
  • Basic Fried Rice
  • Leftover meats or eggs, reheated and chopped or crumbled
  • Lettuce or cabbage, sliced thinly or chopped
  • Cheese, shredded or sliced thinly
  • Hot sauce (Sambal) and/or Salsa
On a plate, lay down the tortilla. Note the you are only filling the center of the tortilla, and you must leave enough "skin" to fold over the filling. Overstuffing it makes for a messy experience. If you prefer a larger burrito, get large tortillas with thinner, softer skins.

Smear some bean dip onto the burrito in a horizontal line, making a "bed" for the other ingredients to lie on. Follow with a spoonful or so of fried rice, then sprinkle over with the leftover meats, some lettuce or cabbage, then cheese. Finish with salsa or hot sauce.

Now, to fold ... there should be two shorter ends at the end of your horizontal strip of filling. Fold those inwards. Then fold up the long flap closest to you, and roll it up toward the other long flap, like a sushi roll. Wrap in foil or parchment paper by placing the roll in the wrapper and rolling it up like you rolled the tortilla around the filling. Wrap tightly to keep it all together.

NOTE: If you have leftover fried rice with stuff in it already (eggs, meat, vegetables, etc.), use that, and same some steps. For instance, you won't need additional protein, and can skip looking for cooked meat. Or if you have leftover salad, use that instead of lettuce or cabbage, etc. It's a very freeform dish!

Back to the Menu: Mexinese / Chixican

Disclaimer: All content is made up, and no profit or lucre is expected, solicited, advocated or paid. This is all just for fun. Any comments, please e-mail the author or WOOKIEEhut directly. Flames will be ignored. Characters and situations are based on those which are the property of LucasFilms Ltd., Bantam Publishing, Random House, Bloomberg, Scholastic, etc. and their respective original owners and developers. The rest is this story's author's own fault. This story may not be posted anywhere without the author's knowledge, consent, and permission.

These recipes are provided "as is," and neither Wookieehut nor any person associated with the website is responsible for any success or failure of the recipes, nor any implied effects. If there are questions, please email the author. This page is presented by Wookieehut.