Manly Shrimp Cocktail
by Runt & SuSu
Rogue Squadron jester Wes Janson would go to all lengths for a good practical joke. He'd even spend a lot of money. He found out that his best friend in the squadron, Hobbie Klivian, had a very bland palate. He wouldn't touch anything spicy, and tended to shy away from seafood. His mother had told him that seafood and spices would give him gas. Consequently, he never ordered it.
It was too much of a temptation for Wes. He bought colossal shrimp, the big, pink, fleshy kind that looked obscene and scary, imported directly from Mon Calamari. He bought specially prepared horseradish sauce (it said HOT on the label) and followed the simple recipe for cocktail sauce on the back of the bottle. He doubled the amount of horseradish, just for a giggle. Then he got Hobbie drunk, and dared him to put things in his mouth, offering to pay for a drink for every object successfully swallowed. As usual, when he was drunk, Hobbie thought the dumbest ideas were funny and he fell for the bait.
Wes dangled the red sauce-slathered, pink, curled, decapitated crustacean before Hobbie's eyes. Suddenly, this dare didn't seem like such a good idea. But Wes teased him, telling him how much he'd spent on this delicacy, then calling him names that questioned his manhood and sexual orientation. "Be a man!" Wes cajoled. So Hobbie closed his eyes and took a bite.
As he chewed, Hobbie realized -- he actually liked it! This stuff wasn't bad! He took the rest of the shrimp in Wes's fingers and devoured it ... then another ... then another. He loved it! He grabbed the bowl, polished it off and demanded more.
Wes was aghast -- his joke had backfired. Wes told him there wasn't anymore, and Hobbie slugged him! In a drunken rage, Hobbie punched Wes repeatedly in the head for teasing him, then not having enough shrimp and sauce. Wes begged for mercy, offering to give him the recipe. Hobbie agreed, and the two men immediately stopped brawling, embraced, and laughed it up. Everyone who had observed this exchange simply shrugged off the incident, "It's a guy thing ..."
In a small bowl, mix together the horseradish sauce and the ketchup. You can store this, covered, in the refrigerator, as is.
If you want to make this look good, lay some lettuce leaves out on a platter, place a small bowl of the sauce on the center or off to the side. Arrange the shrimp with their tails poking up, so they are easier to pick up. You might want to prepare little plates for people to put the shrimp on, and a spoon in the sauce for tidier ladling, rather than dredging the shrimp through the communal bowl. Otherwise, do what Wes did -- toss the sauce and the shrimp together in a single bowl, and dish it out just like that.
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